back to work

One year ago at this time we had no idea I was pregnant. And in two hours my maternity leave will officially end. Crazy.

I have mixed feelings about this. On one hand, I am extremely fortunate to have a career that I find challenging and exciting, and I really like where I work and who I work with. So I am looking forward to returning and being a part of my library again. And having a paycheck again won't hurt either. But on the other hand, I got to hear Clara laugh (not just chuckle, mind you, but full on silly little girl giggle and squeak) for the first time two days ago. It was possibly the most delightful sound I've ever heard, and it made me realize how many other milestones she is likely to have at daycare instead of home with me, which makes me kind of sad.

I could go on and on about the pros and cons of each... I have friends who have chosen to be stay-at-home moms (or dads), and many others who have gone back to work, both out of desire and necessity, and I have all of the respect in the world for both decisions. The media seems to feed the fire of any perceived animosity between these two camps, but I firmly believe that most families do the best they can with the resources they have, and that playing the "my decision is clearly superior to yours" game is unproductive, judgmental, and just plain hurtful. As long as babies are in a loving, nurturing environment, whether that is at home, with a nanny, or in a daycare center, they'll turn out okay. The rest is just gravy.

But I don't really have anything to complain about. I'm lucky enough to have a job that I love, where my coworkers and supervisors have given me nothing but support over having a family. Not only that, but I get to work part-time for the next six months, so I really feel like I will have the best of both worlds for a while. Clara will get to interact with other kids and teachers at a wonderful childcare center a few days a week, while I get to interact with other adults, drink coffee leisurely, and maybe even get to the gym or pool a few days a week. But we'll still get plenty of QT together as well, which I am grateful for because she's only going to be a little chubbly baby for such a short time.

Speaking of QT, I need to stop blogging and go play with my babbling cuddlebunny who just woke up, then off to work we go.