dear clara (two weeks)

Dear Clara,

On my 31st birthday you turned two weeks old. I think back to what your daddy and I were doing one year ago at this time, and in the midst of the alcohol fueled 30th birthday karaoke haze, there is no way we ever could have imagined what this year would bring us: you.

The last two weeks have alternately been the longest and slowest stretches of days that I have ever experienced. It's amazing how much ones sense of time is turned upside down when dictated by the needs of a six pound newborn. I can make hours fly by while staring at your gorgeous face and all of the funny expressions that you make, while fifteen minutes of listening to you cry and not being able to do anything about it seems like an eternity.


Mona, one of our incredible nurses at UCLA Santa Monica, told us that each day we had with you, we would know 1000 times more than we did the day before. At the time, I thought she was just saying that to be nice and make me feel better about my poor battered right breast. (You did quite a job on me, thank you very much.)

But she was right.

Over the last two weeks I have learned how to feed you without piercing pain surging through the right side of my body, how to keep track of teeny tiny doll socks, how to walk a stroller and a 28 lb Boston Terrier with the strength of a sled dog at the same time, and how to get you bundled into your car seat without feeling like I'm torturing you (although this is still touch and go).


I have learned that I love dancing around the living room with you pretending that I sound like Natalie Merchant (and the best part is that you don't care that it's nowhere near the truth). I have learned how to shush, swaddle, swing, and, um... need to learn those a little better. But I'm getting pretty good at the swaddle part. I have learned how to rock a bassinet in my sleep, and how to share my lap with you and Owen at the same time. (This, however, is all dependent on the cooperation level of the cat.) I have learned that my body is a miracle, and that baby skin might just be the most kissable material on the planet. I have learned what family is really all about; that Gramma Vickie is one of the most generous, loving people (and undoubtedly the best Gramma) around, and I am falling in love with Chria all over again watching him fall in love with you.



And all of this barely scratches the surface.

But as much as I'm learning, I can barely imagine what the world looks like through your new bright eyes. I look forward to trying to experience life as you do, one day at a time. Your daddy went back to work today (boo hoo!), so you and I will have a lot of quality time before my maternity leave ends (boo double hoo!) to get to know each other. And I can't wait.


I love you,
Mama

p.s. You also may have noticed that this whole You thing has turned me into the world's biggest sap. Who knows how long this goofy new parent euphoria will last (a long time, I hope!), but for now, your fan club will have to put up with treacly blog posts filled with superlatives and lollipops and rainbows. (With a little temper tantrum and poop mixed in for good measure.)